Seeing is Not Believing - Prelude

For a while now I've been thinking about doing a blog on how seeing is not believing. For Christians, this is a pretty obvious statement as we rely on faith. For some though, the phrase "seeing is believing" is common logic. I think even Christians to some extent are looking for proof in some form or another. For those without faith, believing without seeing impossible. But faith can be acquired and it can be strengthened. There are loads of examples throughout the Bible dealing with this topic and I'm going to study up on this and do a blog soon.

I came across an example of "seeing is not believing" during Wednesday night Bible study. While it is fresh in my mind, I'll write it down just to jump start the upcoming blog.

Mark 1:40
Now a leper came to Him, imploring Him, kneeling down to Him and saying to Him, "If you are willing, You can make me clean." 41 Then Jesus, moved with compassion, stretched out His hand and touched him, and said to him, "I am willing; be cleansed." 42 As soon as He had spoken, immediately the leprosy left him , and sent him away at once...

Yes, the leper saw the result of being healed, but he needed faith in order to see the result. Had he not first believed that Jesus could heal him, he would have not asked and therefore not been healed. He believed without seeing.

This is one of many examples to touch on in the next blog. Stay tuned.

Bring it On!

What a week this has been. When I became an SID, these are the weeks the old-timers warned me about. I haven't been home before 7:15 any night so far and I'm heading out of town tomorrow afternoon and won't be back until around midnight Friday. THEN, we have three home games Saturday.

But you know what, it's made easier because I know spring is here. Or at least really close. I love the spring. Great weather, the grass gets green, I can golf again. I just feel happier in spring. I think almost every does. I am happy, but I can't help but notice that there are many around me that aren't. There are many reasons why they aren't. Sickness, financial troubles, issues at work. No matter what it is, we should not be disheartened or afraid.

Psalm 27
"The Lord is my light and my salvation'; Whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?

"...For in the time of trouble He shall hide me in His pavilion; In the secret place of His tabernacle He shall hide me; He shall set me high upon a rock. And now my head shall be lifted up above my enemies all around me...I will sing, yes, I will sing praises to the Lord."

This might be one of the most uplifting chapters in the Bible. It gives me so much confidence. After reading it I almost feel like shouting, "bring it on!" With God on my side, there is nothing I can't overcome.

I hope those that are having problems in their lives right now take look at this verse and understand what God can truly do.

Take Some Advice

I wasn't entirely sure what to blog about tonight, so I decided to just open the Bible and see what I found. While flipping through, I came upon Ecclesiastes, and I started to read a bit of it. In reading snippets, it seems as the author (probably Solomon) was in a state of depression or maybe just a bitter old man when he wrote the book. But as I read a bit more, that wasn't the case at all.

OK, maybe Solomon was an old man, and likely very cynical at this point in his life, but just like Proverbs, the book of Ecclesiastes offers much wisdom. Solomon is almost unanimously regarded as the wisest man that ever lived, and he received that knowledge directly from God upon request.

All too often we get wrapped up in trying to be the best at everything. We must win the game, get the job, get the girl. What does it profit us? Solomon says nothing, because all is vanity. I can't count how many times people become depressed and vainly look for "the meaning of life," or fill a void with something that as Solomon wrote, is "grasping at the wind." In other words, we are looking and searching for something we think will make us happy but can never attain it.

If we believe Solomon is the wisest man that ever lived, maybe we should take his advice. In 2:26, he wrote "For God gives wisdom and knowledge and joy to a man who is good in His sight..."

Ecclesiastes is an interesting book. Like I said before, reading a verse here and there doesn't provide the full scope and can give a wrong impression. But read it start to finish and it really is beautiful. Not only does it offer advice, but it explains and depicts the eternal majesty and power of God.

Back into Acts

This week was incredibly busy and this is the first moment I've had to sit down and get back into Acts and the forming of my testimony. I left off in Acts 16.

Acts 16: 25-34 - This is the well known account of the Philippian jailer. This is an instance where a major event happened in the jailer's life, leading him to seek out salvation. The interesting thing about this story is that the jailer knew exactly who to speak to. He went right to Paul and Silas and asked "What must I do to be saved?" Remember, Paul and Silas were in prison singing hymns and praying. That's a perfect example of the overwhelming joy and boldness we can find in God. It didn't take a sermon to convince the jailer. His heart was already open. He was simply seeking direction. Paul told him, "Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and you will be saved, you and your household." But they didn't leave it at that. Paul and Silas "spoke the word of the Lord to him and to all who were in his house" (verse 32). They then took them out to be baptized. Paul and Silas did not leave the jailer, knew in his faith, immediately after his conversion. Again, the apostles showed us the importance of helping new Christians through their "infancy."

Acts 17 - Paul stands up in Athens and preaches to the people about the object they worshipped which had an inscription "To the Unknown God." The people of Athens were worshipping many gods and seemingly just to be safe, they created an idol for one they did not know. Paul explained to them that this unknown god was not one of gold or silver or stone, but rather the one that made the heavens and earth and "does not dwell in temples made with hands." Paul starts from the very beginning, explaining that God made everything and concluded at the end, saying that there will come a day when God will judge man through Jesus, who was raised from the dead.

I can think of no better place to start that the beginning. Many people, though, are not easily sold on Creation. But to believe that Jesus is the Son of God, you must believe that God created the earth. Christians today face this battle every day in spreading the gospel. Science is continually trying to solve the mysteries of the universe but continually fall short. The answers to everything are found in the Bible--the beginning and the end. Paul made sure to tell the Athenians what has happened and what will happen. And most importantly, that Jesus resurrected to defeat death, that we may be righteous at the final judgement.

Acts 19:1-7 - In the last part of chapter 18 and the first part of chapter 19, Luke tells us about a man named Apollos, who was a man mighty in the scriptures and fervent in spirit. However, there was one problem. He only knew of the baptism of John. Priscilla and Aquila explained things to him more accurately, and Apollos went on to be a great speaker of the truth. But Apollos had already spread the word of John's baptism, and that's where chapter 19 picks up. Paul runs into some believers that had heard the word from Apollos and knew only of John's baptism. There isn't a word-for-word account of any testimony here, but we see the importance of baptism. The men were believers but had been baptized into John's baptism. If baptism were not important, or an after thought, as so many Christians seem to make it out to be, Paul would have not corrected them and baptized them in the name of the Lord Jesus. Baptism is important, and Paul shows that it is necessary.

Acts 26 - Throughout this chapter, Paul is speaking to King Agrippa, appealing his arrest. Starting in verse 12, he tells the king of his own conversion. Paul's conversion was quite miraculous. He heard Jesus speaking to him, was struck blind and later made well. Some Christians have amazing stories of their conversion. Some do not. I am one of the latter. I remember being at one of those weekly revivals when I was very young. For the first time in my life, what I heard being preached, Jesus' death and resurrection, really struck me in my heart. I had grown up in a church all my life and had heard the story countless times. Maybe it was just growing older and being able to understand the magnitude of Jesus' love and sacrifice, but I was convinced. When I went home, I lied in my bed and asked Jesus to be my Savior. Later, I was baptized. Because I came to Jesus so young, I never had to overcome some great trial or temptation. I never had to fight unbelief. Sometimes I wish I had a story like Paul's, but when I think about it, I am grateful that I never had to face those difficult times. And later, when those temptations came, I was ready to face them. I am eternally grateful to God for that.

The lesson to be learned from Paul's testimony in chapter 26 is each Christian's personal conversion is special and amazing regardless of the circumstances surrounding it. There may have been no beam of light or vision that led you to the truth, but the fact that your heart was opened and you were forgiven by God through Jesus' death and resurrection is miraculous in its own right. Each Christian's conversion is different, but it is uniquely special, and there is no doubt in my mind that the God that created the heavens and eart (and each of us) knew the exact message we needed to hear at that exact moment in our lives. Maybe I don't know for sure why my heart was opened on that particular night, but it happened that way for a reason. And God has intended for me to share that story--as unmiraculous as it may seem--to others.

This journey through Acts has been so benefical. I believe that now I have my testimony. Time to start using it.

Forming a Testimony - Part 3

As you can see from the title, we are plugging through Acts. Let's get right to it.

Acts 10 - This chapter is literally a watershed moment in the history of Christianity. Peter sees a vision about unclean animals and God tells him eat. Prior to this vision, the gospel was being preached only to the Jews. This vision symbolized the tearing down of boundary between Jew and Gentile and that God was going to pour His Holy Spirit out on the Gentiles. Not coincidentally, Cornelius, a Roman centurion (a gentile) was a told in a vision to call for Peter. Upon Peter's arrival, he shares his vision, and his testimony.

He begins by saying "In truth I perceive that God shows no partiality. But in every nation whoever fears Him and works righteousness is accepted by Him." That is kind of like what we saw yesterday with the conversion of Saul. Any sinner can be saved.

Peter continues by saying that Jesus was anointed by God and that he was killed and raised on the third day. He said that many witnesses saw Jesus after His resurrection.

In verse 42, for the first time, we see a justification for sharing the gospel in a testimony. "He commanded us to preach to the people, and to testify that it is He who was ordained by God to be Judge of the living and the dead." I think this part is important to remember because a situation may arise where the person you are testifying to will say, "why do you care what happens to me." This gives us an answer.

Peter concluded by saying "To Him all prophets witness that, through His name, whoever believes in Him will receive remission of sins." The Holy Spirit was then poured out, the people spoke in tongues and Peter then commanded them to be baptized in the name of the Lord.

I am definitely seeing a pattern in the apostles testimony. It is key to point out that they ALWAYS build the testimony on scripture, say who Jesus was and that He died and rose again. And there is always an explanation on HOW to be saved. The apostles never left those listening high and dry and wondering, "what should I do now?"

Something else I've noticed is that many times the apostles would stay a few days in the place that they preached or where people had just been saved. This isn't always the case, but I think there is a reason for this. People who have just been saved certainly have many questions about where to go from there. The apostles may have stayed to answer those questions and help the people in their Christian infancy. Any time someone near us is saved, it is an obligation to keep tabs on them and help them through any temptations and pitfalls.

Acts 16:11-15 - There is no word-for-word account of Paul and Luke's testimony to Lydia, but it does say that she worshiped God prior to her being saved. It also says that the Lord opened her heart o heed the things spoken by Paul. This should give any of us sharing a testimony confidence and reinforcement. We just have to share the word, God does the rest.

Well, there are 12 more chapters in the book of Acts, so I'm thinking three more blogs and I should have my own testimony.

Testimony - Part 2

Yesterday I started on my journey through Acts to form my testimony by using the Apostles as examples. I am picking up where I left off, Acts 9. This one is short because I don't have much time tonight.

Acts 9 - This is one of the most pivotal points in the Bible. Saul, who was persecuting the church, was singled out by God on the road to Damascus. Jesus appeared to Him, struck him blind, and he eventually went to a man named Ananias. Ananias laid hands on Saul, baptized him, and Saul immediately started preaching that "He is the Son of God." (verse 20).

In the rest of the chapter, we see the healing of Aeneas and Peter restoring Dorcas to life. Throughout Acts, there are incredible miracles--miracles that we cannot perform today. There aren't any outright examples of "testimonies" in this chapter, but the conversion of Saul is too important to pass. What I can learn from Saul's conversion is that God can save any person. Saul was, as he called himself later, the chief of all sinners. Jesus asked him, "Why are you persecuting me?"

I think there are many people that feel they can never be forgiven of their sins completely. But God showed that not only did he forgive and save Saul, he used him incredible ways. Saul healed, preached, overcame snake bites, shipwrecks, stoning, prison and wrote almost the entire New Testament. All that from the "chief of sinners." Yes, God can, and will save any one. The key is to be like Saul and ask "Lord, what do You want me to do?" And when the answer comes, be just like Saul and obey.

Forming a Testimony - Part 1

Yesterday I wrote about having a testimony. Well, I'm going to use this blog to build mine. The best way for me to understand what a testimony should be is to look at examples of others. The best I know of are in Acts as that is when the Apostles began spreading the word throughout the world. So basically, over the next few days, I'm going to start at the beginning of Acts and work my way through, recording each time an apostle shared his faith with someone.

Acts 2 14:39 - These verses are Peter preaching on the day of Pentecost after the Holy Spirit was given. This situation was special because of the incredible miracle and circumstances surrounding it. 3,000 people were saved that day, and Peter didn't really say all that much. He started out by quoting scripture (2:17-21). He explained to the Jews that Jesus was put to death by crucifiction and was raised by God, defeating death. Peter also explained to them what they were seeing (verse 33). Just before that, he quote a Psalm in which David spoke of God making him "full of joy in Your presence." He closed by stating that Jesus is the Son of God.

Conclusion - The Jews that witnessed the outpouring of the Holy Spirit must have had many questions, and Peter explained it to them. But it was a simple message: Jesus is the Son of God. He was crucified and raised from the dead, defeating death. The result is that we, through Jesus, can overcome death as well if we "Repent, and let every one of you be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit." It's important that Peter explained to the Jews HOW they could be saved.

Acts 3 - There is no mention of any one being saved in this chapter, but Peter's testimony is so powerful that he and John were arrested because of it. It all started with him healing a crippled man. Now, I cannot heal the lame, but I can follow Peter's example. The man was asking for money. He could not work and was in need of help. Peter told him he could not give him any money, but appealed to the man's neediness by offering something better. He healed the man, but he explained that it was through faith in Jesus that he was healed. Just like in Acts 2, Peter explained that Jesus was crucified and raised from the dead, fulfilling scripture and for the people to "Repent therefore and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, so that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord..."

Conclusion - Peter followed the same basic formula he did in Acts 2. He quoted scripture, explained the miracle, explained that Jesus died and rose from the dead and that you must repent. I think it's very important to note how he should that with faith in Jesus, any illness or infirmity can be overcome.

Acts 8:26-40 - In this passage, Philip helps an Ethiopian eunuch understand scripture. The Ethiopian was already interested and inquisitive but simply did not understand. This is where Philip, using his knowledge, explained Isaiah 53:7. The passage says that Philip "beginning at this Scripture, preached Jesus to him." I take this to mean that Philip told the Ethiopian that Jesus was crucified in order to save. Philip also must have explained to him HOW he could be saved, because when the two saw water, the Ethiopian said to Philip, "See, here is water. What hinders me from being baptized." Philip must have told the man about baptism before this. Philip told him, "If you believe with all your heart, you may."

Conclusion - Once again, the apostles use the foundation of Old Testament prophecy to explain Jesus' death and resurrection. This is an interesting story because it seems that the Ethiopian knew he needed something, but just didn't know quite what it was. Philip explained it to him.

I think that's a good place to stop for today, but a great start so far. This has already been helpful. Looking ahead, tomorrow I will look at the conversion of Saul and the start of his ministry.

Testimony

My good friend Adam just got engaged. Congrats to him. It's odd to think that not all that long ago we met when Midway Elementary was consolidated and he came to Sardis in the sixth grade. Now we are both married (or soon will be). And really, it wasn't that long ago. 13 years ago. Incredible to think what can happen in such a short span of time. It makes me wonder what things will be like when I'm 38.

Adam also just got back from a mission trip to Costa Rica. It's his second or third trip to the country. I've always admired missionaries and well, teachers and preachers of any kind for that matter. But especially those that work on a personal level with unbelievers or new believers and help foster relationships with Christ.

I often think it would be easier to minister to total strangers, but honestly, it's not an easy job. It least it never has been for me. I think a big reason why is that I'm not prepared.

Everyone should have a testimony to share. I always think that my story would be rather boring and rather ineffective, but what I need to remember is that as long as the testimony centers on truth and the death and resurrection of Jesus, it can't be ineffective. After all, Jesus said in Luke 12:12, "For the Holy Spirit will teach you in that very hour what you ought to say."

Trusting that the Holy Spirit will use me as a vessel for God's message is key. Without the trust, I cannot do anything, but with it, I cannot fail.

I just finished reading about Andrew in the book Twelve Ordinary Men. Andrew was the first to be called by Jesus and he was obviously close to Jesus but was never mentioned in Acts after the upper room meeting in chapter 1. Yet Andrew played a huge role in the growth of the church. He introduced Peter to Jesus and also brought the young boy with the fish and loaves to Jesus just before one of the most amazing miracles int he Bible. The author of the book points out that because Andrew introduced Peter to Jesus, it makes him the first to go into someone's home and share the gospel. Andrew also brought some Greeks to Jesus in John 12, making him kind of a foreign missionary as well.

That all goes to show the trust and faith Andrew had in Jesus. He knew there were five thousand men waiting to be fed, so why would he bother to bring Jesus five loaves and two fish if he did not believe that Jesus could turn it in to a miracle?

While Andrew never preached to the masses as Peter did and never wrote a book of the Bible, he made an impact on a personal level. He is really an example of what we all could be. Not all of us have the rhetorical skills to have a TV show or the writing skills to pen a book, but each of us has the ability to share what we know to our friends, family and strangers alike.

I'm going to take a cue from Andrew and start working on my testimony so I can start sharing my faith.

Love...Not for Valentine's

I was reading and preparing for a blog about how the world can identify Christians, but when I logged on to Trista's homepage, msn.com, the lead story was about Charles Darwin's 200th birthday and eight examples of how animals are evolving before our eyes!

It's funny that in one example, animals evolved in my lifetime by making its legs grow shorter or its beaks smaller, but in another it says that a certain type of Skink has evolved to no longer use its legs over a period of 3.7 million years, which according to the article, is very fast in terms of evolution. If 3.7 million years is fast, what is 25 years?

My favorite snippet from the article was this. I'm sure you'll get a chuckle.

"Is human activity “natural”? Scientists say human activity is indeed affecting the evolution of other species. In one example, the human preference for large snow lotus plants, which are used in traditional Tibetan and Chinese medicine, has meant that only the smaller plants go to seed. Hence, the snow lotus is getting smaller. In another example, scientists have found that human preference for trophy game such as big fish and caribou is driving these species to become smaller and reproduce at younger ages."

Really? Lotus plants know they are going to be picked so they decide to grow smaller? Those plants are totally outsmarting us humans! And how about those fish and caribou? Can't you just see them all sitting around the field saying, "Alright guys. You know the humans only like to shoot the ones that are fat and have big antlers. So stop growing and quit eating so our genes will evolve and make our offspring even smaller."

If only we all could evolve that easily. If it were that simple, we would all be able to breathe underwater and fly.

Proponents of evolution can argue with me all they want, but until they can answer this one question, there can be no discussion: Matter cannot be created from nothing. So how was the earth created?

Obviously, evolutionists have no answer for this. My answer is simple: "In the beginning God created the heavens and earth." Genesis 1:1.

For those that praise Darwin and his work, I invite you to read this comparison between him and another man born on this same day: Abraham Lincoln.

Now, on to the original topic of the blog. Many times I wonder if my coworkers and neighbors know I'm a Christian. Do my actions and words portray what a Christian should be?

Obviously, there should be an effort on my part to share my faith with those around me, but Jesus gave us the way to show our faith to everyone. In John 13:34-35, he said, "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another."

Many times this verse gets confused with the "Golden Rule." You know, "do unto others." It's something like it, but it's more than just treating people nicely. It's loving them and loving them as Jesus loved us. And there was never any one that loved us more, as He died on the cross for each of us.

That goes to show the magnitude of the love Jesus is talking about. I know that everyone has that one person at work that gets on their last nerve and irritates them to the point of anger. To deal with this person, sometimes there are confrontations or maybe you vent to another colleague. But if we truly love this person as Jesus loved us, we will forgive them--or ask for forgiveness--immediately. Hard to do, yes. But so was death on the cross.

So many times in the New Testament the idea "bearing fruit" is discussed. In John 15, Jesus says that if we abide in Him we will bear fruit. Otherwise, we will wither and be cast out. 1 Colossians stats the importance of being fruitful in every good work. Bearing good fruit is proof that we are taking care of business as Christians and those around us will know us by our fruits.

But again, we can only bear fruit unless we abide in Christ. And that cannot happen unless with love Christ and love each other, just as He said in John 13.

Unfortunately, love is word that is so missused and taken for granted. But the true meaning can be found John 15:13 when he said that "greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends."

In Mark 12, Jesus said for us to "love your neighbor as yourself." This wasn't just good advice, He said it was the greatest commandment.

Love is so much more than an idea or word. It is an action. An action that people can see, feel and recognize.

If I want to show my co-workers and neighbors that I'm a Christian, I have to love them and be willing to do what Christ did for me.

Human Beings

I'm slowly working my way through a book title Twelve Ordinary Men. From what I've read so far (and I haven't gotten that far), it is about how Jesus took men with no particular talents and were from no standing in life and molded them into His apostles and teachers of the gospel.

In only the first 50 or so pages, I already disagree with the author on some things, but I will say it is interesting to view the apostles as real people. Many times I think there is a tendency to dehumanize them because of the prominent roles they played. Don't get me wrong, I'm not belittling their contributions. But I am saying that before Jesus took them by His side, taught, guided and corrected them, they were just regular fellows like you and me.

A few of them were fishermen, another was a tax collector and another was a zealot. I never really knew what a zealot was until I researched it. Zealots were Jews that rebelled against Roman rule and were often provoked violence towards them. Imagine how Simon (the zealot) and Matthew (the tax collector) felt toward each other before Jesus brought them together.

All throughout the gospels, there are many examples of the apostles' human frailty. No one exhibited this more than Peter, the man who eventually become the leader of the apostles in many ways.

Something the book pointed out that I never realized: in every list of the apostles, Peter is named first. Always, Judas is named last. In fact, Every time all 12 are listed, the names are in almost identical order. I think it is reasonable to say that some apostles were closer to Jesus than others. And from a management standpoint, that makes perfect sense. It's not that Jesus favored one over another. Imagine if he had given equal power and knowledge to all 12. Who would have settled debates? Who would have been looked to for leadership? It is quite obvious in Acts that Peter is the leader as he preached on the day of Pentecost after the Holy Spirit was given and God also gave Peter the vision that led the apostles to preach to gentiles.

As the book says, Peter exhibited so many of the "raw materials" that you look for in a leader. He was always the first into the water (literally!) and the first to respond to questions. He had a thirst for knowledge, he took initiative and most importantly, he was teachable. Jesus saw those traits and molded him into not just a leader, but a great leader.

Peter had many flaws as well. But Jesus used those shortcomings to teach. Take for instance Matthew 16, when Peter told Jesus that He would not have to suffer. Jesus said to him, "get behind Me, Satan!" Basically telling Peter, "you don't know what I have to do, and you won't stop me from doing it!" At that moment, Peter understood only the things of men and not the things of God. And at that moment, he was an enemy. Peter's mouth often wrote checks he couldn't cash, but it was obvious that later, when he was writing 1 and 2 Peter that all the lessons left an impact on him.

In 1 Peter 2 he wrote a great deal about being submissive. What a dramatic turn from the brash young man that was portrayed in many instances in the gospel.

Before ever doing any in depth study, I always admired Peter. He was always the character I wanted to play in the church plays. Yes, he and all of the disciples were flawed but with faith and boldness they overcame the shortcomings and spread the gospel to every corner of the earth.

I am flawed too. But I also have characteristics that God can and wants to use just like He did with the apostles. It's up to me, though, to put my strengths to work and become even stronger by improving upon my weakness.

Reminder Through Tough Love

A new year and a new life. The last time I blogged was in June. Since then, I've taken a new job, moved (twice) and gotten married...not necessarily listed in chronological order or order of importance.

I actually thought I had given up on the blog. But I remembered one of the reasons that I started writing it in the first place--providing me a release and a platform in which to vent, share my thoughts, and most importantly, hold myself accountable for my Christianity.

There are many excuses I can make about why I stopped and maybe they would be valid, but restarting this blog isn't about why I stopped. It's about why I need to be writing it.

For six or so months, this little site gave me the avenue and a reminder each day to dig into my Bible and share with whoever wanted to read what I was reading and what I was feeling. My life changed dramatically and at the time I thought I wouldn't need to blog any more, but the fact is, moving and getting married is a HUGE adjustment and the routine that was working for me, reading the Bible and praying before I went to bed was broken. Believe me, it's no fault of my wife. It's my fault for not adjusting. Instead of finding a new time to study and to pray, I gave it up altogether. And what kind of Christian does that?

It's odd, though. When I lived in Erie, I rarely attended church. Partly because of work and partly because I couldn't find a place where I was comfortable. Instead, I made up for it by reading and listening to sermons on the Internet, playing my guitar an singing songs. Now, I'm attending church three times a week sometimes but in many ways I've never been more separated from Jesus. I've become a lazy Christian. I forget to pray. I never open my Bible except for at church.

The sad part is, I never would have come to this realization unless God had smacked me upside the head recently. For those of you who do not believe in free will, well, this explanation won't make much sense to you. But I've always known that God doesn't inflict punishment on us, He merely pulls His hand of protection away. Without His hand, we are open to all the shots that Satan has for us. Think of it as a boxer. Without him keeping his hands up to block the blows of his opponents, he's going to be KO'd in the first round!

God knows where we are vulnerable. For me, it's my health. I've always been wary of it and probably a bit of a wuss when you get right down to it. I don't want it to sound like God make me sick, but I've been sick for about three weeks now and just when I feel like I'm never going to get better I realize that I'm not trusting in or relying on God and that I've not put any effort into my relationship with him. I was sulking and getting worse every time I thought about how much more sick I could get. Like I said, God didn't make me sick, but He certainly knows when I've reached the end of my rope and when to speak to me.

Realizing this doesn't mean God is going to heal me right now, nor should I expect Him to. I don't deserve a pat on the back for figuring it out. In fact, I'm ashamed I ever let it get to this point. The point here is two-fold: Laziness as a Christian--or in anything in life--is not an option, and God will always give us a way to draw closer to Him. Sometimes it can be in our worst moments, but sometimes that's the only time we'll allow His voice to reach our deaf ears.

It's amazing how I can see myself in many of the Bible's famous stories. The Israelites, seemingly hundreds of times, turned away only to go crawling back to God when times get rough and there He is, welcoming them into His arms. Samson, even after he gave away his secret, God gave him strength one last time when he needed it. Peter, so many times, being brash, losing his faith and even denying Jesus, was still given the Holy Spirit and became one of the greatest teachers of the Word.

God is forgiving. But God is our Father, and sometimes his children need some tough love. I've gotten that and I praise Him for it.

I'll be back tomorrow. Count on it.